Esther: no longer an old lady name

ESTHER (EHS-ter)

Origin: Persia

Meaning: Star

Most notable Esther: a Persian queen and Jewish heroine.  It is not the most annoying thing about being me, but my name has caused a certain battle through the years. It’s always a conversation starter, and people never spell it right. There’s always a thousand questions, but it is always remembered.  Most remember my name for a couple of reasons. You love it, like I do, because it’s “different” or “love that old names are coming back”. You’ve known me for years, and are shocked when you meet another Esther. You may even remember it because of Aunt Esther on the Jeffersons. Or, you just remember it’s an “old lady name”.  I have had every nickname there is surrounding my name. Essie from my family. Easter from people who don’t know how to pronounce it. Oh, and the LOVING “Esturd” from my so very kind elementary peers. Reed still calls me Ethel, as one of his friends asked him how “Ethel” was doing when we first started dating. When he told her this was not my name, she replied “I just remembered it was an old lady name with an E.” Considering Lucy and Ethel are the most iconic comedy duo ever, I’ll take it. It’s my favorite way to stay humble, and may have sent a few of our wedding invitations with a return address to “Reed and Ethel”.  Everyone always asks what grandmother I’m named after, to which I reply “Catherine is my Grammy’s middle name.” Their eyes usually dilate, realizing Esther was hand picked and not passed down. Then, they ask if my parents are deeply religious. They are religious, but not in the way I know they are insinuating. I imagine they picture my mom in a long denim skirt and my father being a highly strict, intimidating man, both of which are incorrect.  I use to hate my name. No one questions which grandmother “Ashley” or “Emily” is named after. I wanted a top ten 1995 baby name too! My brother, Joshua, got one of the most normal names of all!! (Even if mom wanted him to be Mordecai, but that’s beside the point). Everyone else got cool nicknames because their names were doubled, sometimes quadrupled, in classes.  I received confused looks from teachers on the first day of school, when I would tell them I went by Esther, and not Catherine. When they finally did accept it, most spelled it “Ester”, probably remembering the Ester-C commercials. I had to correct my school system of 13 years when graduating, because they still left the H out. I assured them it wasn’t “Es-Thur”, and it was traditionally spelled with an H. I may have wanted to slap people with a Bible table of contents once or twice.  As I was learning to love my name in high school, something happened I’ll never forget. Some of my close friends threw a small surprise party for me. They went to the local BiLo, and asked the baker to write a message on a cookie cake. The cake decorator asked if they were getting a cake for their grandmother. They laughed and told him it was for a friend who was turning 15.  “Do her parents hate her or something?”  My friends, of course, thought this was hilarious. What 15 year old wouldn’t? At the time, I was the only Esther any of us knew who couldn’t get senior specials at Golden Corral. We still laugh about it to this day.  But that question: Do my parents hate me? Absolutely not.  Just to reiterate, my mom is not a dainty Bible Belt woman, and she didn’t want her daughter to be one either. My parents wanted to name me after a strong, somewhat rebellious, biblical woman. Luckily, there are options for this, though not nearly enough awesome women with actual names, but my mom avoided Tamar, Rahab, and Jehosheba. There was Abigail, who rebelled against her husband to do what was right. Abigail is truly my mother’s hero. Had this been my name, this would have never been written. My mom still begs for me to name my daughter this. I have learned to love having a unique name, and can name at least six Abbie/Abby/Abbis off the top of my head, so this won’t be happening. No offense to my Abigail friends. You’re beautiful, and you have a cool biblical idol too.  There was Tabitha, one of the only women named as a disciple. For my bible scholars out there, this is huge. Women, especially named women, are lacking in comparison to men in the Bible. I would bet there are church goers who can name all 12 of the male disciples, but had no idea that there were any females named. She is important. But I am definitely not a “Tabby”, so I’m glad that was thrown out.  And then there was Esther, a Jewish girl, turned Persian queen, and leading character of the play that brought my parents together. In 1992, my parents went on a mission trip, teaching kids through plays and bible study. The play my parents performed on this trip was about a shy, orphan girl, who learned she had more power than she could have dreamed. She was beautiful, and smart. She was a loyal friend, and faithful believer. She may have died 3,500 years ago, but she is my hero.  There is no question why Esther is one of two of the only books in the Bible named after a woman. This story has tension, TWO no-nonsense queens, a beauty pageant, genocide, romance, family dynamics, murder and everything else you could ever want in a story. Start at Esther 1, and find out for yourself. (Or, for those of you who have already read it, listen to the Bible Binge podcast for an entertaining twist. Shoutout Knox and Jamie for inspiration!) What I love most about her story, is that even though Esther is the central character, she didn’t want any of it. She was a normal girl. Esther didn’t want power or responsibility. She didn’t want to be queen. She didn’t want to ask the king to save her people. She just wanted a humble life with her family and friends, but she killed it as a queen, and quite literally I may add.  “For if you keep silent at this time, relief and deliverance will rise for the Jews from another place, but you and your father's house will perish. And who knows whether you have not come to the kingdom for such a time as this?" ‭‭Esther‬ ‭4:14‬ ‭ I have “For Such a Time as This” tattooed on my arm to remind me of this message everyday. I relate to Esther on so many levels. What we’re taught in Sunday School to remember about Esther is that she did what was called of her. What I like to remember about her is that she hesitated and in no way, shape or form, wanted this responsibility. When her family was threatened, she wanted to help but didn’t cause a scene. She initially said, in a paraphrase, “look man, we all know I’ll die if the king doesn’t want to talk to me, and he hasn’t asked to talk to me in 30 days. Not going to happen.”  She was definitely realistic, as I imagine any of us would be. But then, Mordecai said those famous words. “...For such a time as this”. It doesn’t say this in the Bible, but I like to think she was either annoyed, or convicted, because he was right. “And if I perish, I perish”. This sounds confident when reading it , but I like to think she was reminding him of the stakes. Basically, “Fine. You better tell everyone to pray, because I’m risking my life here and we have one shot at this.” She didn’t want to be in this situation, but there was a purpose. There is always purpose in God’s calling. She wasn’t a delicate queen either. We remember her as a devoted servant, but she was a conqueror. She broke the rules, had the king wrapped around her finger, manipulated his right hand man, and then put the heads of her enemies on stakes. That’s right: STAKES. The verse says “gallows”, but as I learned from my history loving father, it was not the kind you picture today. (Chapter 9 and 10 of Esther. You’re welcome). You know the movie 300? Yeah, that’s the king we’re talking about here. Your Sunday school teacher probably left that part out of the story, too. Esther doesn’t sound like a granny anymore, does she? I have not only learned to love my name, but to have a sincere attachment to it. It is important because of the love that went into picking it, and the courage of a woman who died a long before Jesus even roamed the Earth.  What initially inspired me to write this was learning a fun fact. In 2018, Esther was the 153rd ranked baby girl name, according to the SSA. This is the most popular it’s ever been, and continues to grow popularity. Thousands of little baby Esthers just running around, probably not having to deal with constant questions when they introduce themselves to people. Thousands of children who I have this new, weird connection with. As our culture changes, many more are looking for strong, courageous women to name their girls after, and I personally cannot think of a better one. It is about time Esther gets the recognition she deserves, whether from me, in a nursing home, or in a newborn’s nursery. 

One of my 2020 goals is to be an Esther: bold and courageous enough to stand for the truth, to voice my opinions and fight for the good of others. So I will continue to embrace my name, and encourage every woman and girl I meet to be their own Esther. Be realistic, while still standing tall. Break the rules, and take names. Find your purpose, and don’t take anything less. Follow God’s plan, no matter the cost. 

Esther is no longer, nor was ever, an old lady name; it’s a force to be reckoned with.